As church was finishing up today, I felt a sense of frustration kick up again.  I’ve been blessed to be the pastor at First Christian for over six years. It’s been a good few years, but there is always a frustration: we haven’t really grown in numbers over the years. People come to the church, and more often than not, they say they want to start coming on a regular basis.  

And then they never come back.

The most recent was a family that was showing up.  The father said positive things about the church, but they haven’t returned since the spring.  I keep wondering what have I done wrong.  Did I say or do the wrong thing? Is it the size of the church that scares people away?  

I keep feeling that this is all my fault.  Other pastors are able to get people to visit their churches, and I wonder why that doesn’t happen to me.

My technical mind thinks I need to do something.  A better website, become open and affirming, get a good sign outside.  But that’s not why people come to church. 

People from the neighborhood don’t come.  Is it because we are diverse?  Are they weirded out by an African American pastor? 

Maybe at the end of the day it doesn’t matter.  But it’s hard not to think I’m doing something wrong or that I’m cursed or something.

I would like to see this church grow.  How does that happen?  Some will say leave it up to God and others will say it is all about how the church welcomes people.  Which is the right one?

All I can do is pray to God and hope that God will speak to me in someway.